The concept of loving detachment can be a life-saver for the supporter of an alcoholic, but great reward usually requires great work. Embracing loving detachment means embracing some foundational changes in your own actions and beliefs. The first of this three-post series on loving detachment focussed on the overall concept of loving the addict while [...]

Within the concept of loving detachment, there are two types of detachment to practice: physical and emotional. This blog deals with physical detachment and the next one will deal with emotional detachment. Both are critical to your health and sanity. As I mentioned in my last bog, loving detachment doesn’t require that you physically leave [...]

Loving detachment is a great skill for the supporter of an alcoholic.   We tend to gravitate toward situations where we are needed, including in our relationships.  And for good reason: we get things done, we can multi-task like no one else, and we just intuitively seem to know what to do to make the world [...]

By far, the greatest keyword search that brings viewers to this blog is the phrase “loving detachment”.  My guess is that people in pain have been told that loving detachment is powerful remedy, so they are desperate to look on the internet for the recipe.  I was there too, not so long ago.  I searched for [...]

Many of us, me included, like to start the New Year with a list of  things we would like to accomplish in the coming twelve months.  Over the years, I’ve realized that it is equally important my list also includes desired changes in behaviour and attitude.  It’s not always about adding to your life; sometimes [...]

Life would be so much easier if we only had our own crazy feelings to deal with.  But for those of us close to an alcoholic or anyone else with serious issues, we must also face their behaviors and emotions.   And those can be pretty cruel sometimes.   The combination of them knowing us well and [...]

There are, indeed, three C’s in the word “acceptance”, but those aren’t the C’s I’m referring to. We who love or have loved an alcoholic want so much for their health and happiness that when bad behavior occurs, we almost forget that they are sick.  If your child had a temperature of 101, would you [...]

As a parent – or anyone who loves someone they feel is not entirely capable of looking after themselves – we know that it can be difficult to make the distinction between caring, and care taking.  I recently saw a movie (based on a true story) about a genetically engineered younger sister of a child [...]